Is there such a thing as a Hollywood body? And what does that mean not just for film stars but for us mere mortals?
When Men’s Fitness put a jacked-looking Sacha Baron Cohen in its front cover for the August issue, the whole world took notice of his Hollywood body. News outlets from all over the world wanted to find out how the man who famously rocked a mankini as Borat could have got himself in such stellar shape – and, more importantly, why?
The one thing that Hollywood stars share is that modern adage – cash rich, time poor. In fact, this could equally be extended to all of us. As a reader of Men’s Fitness, you’ll be patently aware of the number of workouts and sessions that have a time-limit on them; it seems that we’re all trying to cram our exercise in.
But there’s a lot that can be achieved in a short space of time. “I now believe that just 20 to 30 minutes of movement a day can make a real difference,” says Baron Cohen. “And it’s something anyone can fit into their routine, especially celebrities with personal assistants to do all the boring stuff like shopping and attending friends’ funerals,” he jokes.
Enter celebrity trainer Alfonso Moretti, the man behind the scenes who has shaped Hollywood royalty and Fortune 500 execs alike. His minimalist, brutally effective methods for Baron Cohen would soon become the key to one of the most surprising body transformations in showbiz.
Alfonso, aka The Angry Trainer, has a well-established reputation for transforming physiques to nigh’ on impossible deadlines, using a no-nonsense, gimmick-free approach to training and nutrition – something that we can all learn from.
What do celebrities want when they engage his services? “Results,” says Alfonso, categorically. “Everyone wants the same thing: results. The difference between celebrities and us mortals is that their job and career can often hinge on the success of their exercise and nutrition programs and, ultimately, how they look. They have very little free time and expect that if they’re working 17-hour days on set, my workouts and program better be worth their time.”
What does he expect from his clients? “I won’t accept anything less than 100% commitment,” he confides. “I’m often waking up at 2, 3 or 4am to train clients in different time zones. I’ve reached a point in my career where I care more about my clients’ success than I do about clout. I put all my energy into each client’s programme and I expect the same level of dedication.”
A trip to (West) Hollywood
Certainly, walking around West Hollywood you get the feeling that it’s not just the film stars that are heeding Alfonso’s words: the results are right there in front of your eyes. It is definitely home (well close) to the bold and the beautiful. Located at the base of the Hollywood Hills and adjacent to Beverly Hills, the city of West Hollywood is just 4.9 square kilometres in size and has a population of 36,000. And yet, it has more day and wellness spas than you can shake a stick at and a vibe that oozes health and fitness.
And yet it’s less ‘Hollywood’ than you would imagine. If you’re expecting to see pneumatically-enhanced and Botox-filled individuals strutting their stuff armed to the teeth in Lululemon, then you’ll be sorely disappointed. What West Hollywood has to offer is much more subtle than that. Yes, there is wellness in there but it’s a vibe that says positive wellbeing than overtly over-produced. Save that for Beverly Hills – the West Hollywood people are cooler than that.
“People label everything now,” says Alfonso, when asked about the typical Hollywood body. “What most people are referring to is when celebrities get heathier and fitter by eating better and exercising. With so many people falling into the obese category, it seems anyone of normal body weight is considered thin and Hollywood-esqe.”
How to see West Hollywood (and get fit at the same time!)
- Take a bike tour
Much of West Hollywood is pretty flat, certainly if you head along Santa Monica Boulevard, the major street running through the city of West Hollywood. Known as a cultural and LGBTQ+ hub, featuring rainbow crosswalks, diverse nightlife, public art, and iconic restaurants and bars, it’s perfectly accessible on a bike: you’ve just got to get used to the multiple traffic lights and cycling on the other side of the road! Bikes and Hikes LA Tours (bikesandhikesla.com/) specialises in outdoor Los Angeles tours for guests of all ages. Founded by Danny Roman, it’s bold claim to be “the top outdoor adventure company in Los Angeles” seems to be spot on. You can choose between a regular bike and an e-bike (the latter is a good choice if you head along Sunset Strip as it’s pretty lumpy, although if you want a good workout, use leg power). Bikes and Hikes offers a wealth of tours; they are all informative and packed full of trivia; and are a fantastic way to see the area.
- Take a walk
Walking around West Hollywood is fascinating, especially if you’re a fan of music. The area is literally teeming with history, from the Viper Rooms, the nightclub and music venue on Sunset Strip, once owned by Johnny Depp and where River Phoenix fatally overdosed; to the legendary Rainbow Bar and Grill, a monument to the golden age of rock and roll, and a place where legends were made and celebrated. Both of these musical haunts are on the Rock and Walk Tour of Sunset Strip, brainchild of the charismatic host Jon D’Amico, former bass guitarist of LA bands Stalag 15 and Slick Fifty and stage manager for monsters of rock such as Guns & Roses, Alice in Chains and Eagles of Death Metal. “I created this Rock ‘n Roll Walking Tour (rocknwalktours.com/) in 2017 to give my guests from around the world a fun and memorable way to explore the history of a legendary rock ‘n roll playground,” says Jon, whose stories and fascinating titbits shared with him by celebrity sources and local historians are past on to anyone taking the tour. Be warned: you may be sworn to secrecy on some of the juicier celeb stories!
- Try running
This is easier said than done. I got my kit on and ventured down what is the incredibly steep hill of North Olive Drive to Santa Monica Boulevard at the bottom. It is always amazing to run in a new place and a great way to see a city. But, whereas in the UK, you can take your life in your hands and cross the road seemingly anywhere, in the US ‘jaywalking’ is illegal, so waiting for the crossings to go green seems to take an eternity. On more than one occasion, I incurred the wrath of an irate motorist as I looked the wrong way crossing the road. Still, I was in my running kit so I think I got a pass. I went for an out-and-back route (jetlag was feeling very reel) so it was with some trepidation that I ventured back to North Olive Drive and the dreaded hill back to The Mondrian, my ‘home’ for this trip. The pictures don’t do it justice: as they say in the US “that’s one steep mother”.
The call of the gym
Of course, you don’t have to be outside to get fit in Hollywood. Some of the biggest stars can be seen in gyms in West Hollywood, although many, like Mark Wahlberg, have purpose-built gyms in their Hollywood homes. The star of Daddy’s Home and The Other Guys once spent $2 million building a state-of-the-art gym in a former aircraft hangar at his home in Beverly Hills.
Kitted out with myriad free weights, weight machines and punchbags, and larger than many commercial gyms, it also had a mezzanine for the cardio machines. There was even a full-size boxing ring. All essential when you consider the action movies for which he has been required to bulk up.
But you don’t need to spend millions to get Hollywood results. One of the hottest gyms in West Hollywood is the Dogpound, an uber-cool fitness space much beloved by Taylor Swift and Hugh Jackman. OK, so it’s not cheap – memberships start from $8,000 a year up to eye-watering amounts (if you didn’t think that was eye-watering enough!).
The man behind the Dogpound — so-called because in the early days his clients would always bring their pups along with them to train — is Kirk Myers. Having been 300lbs as a high school student, Kirk radically changed his life after twice suffering from congestive heart failure.
He opened the first Dogpound in New York with a second location in West Hollywood in 2019. Don’t expect to find yourself running alongside your favourite popstar though – all sessions are appointment only and training programmes are highly tailored to each individual’s needs. There’s a waiting list to join and a single PT workout will set you back anywhere from $200 to $500 depending on your trainer, while a session with gloriously-tattooed Myers is rumoured to cost up to $1,000!
My colleagues and I were put through a private session by one of the in-house trainers, an incredibly flexible woman whose musculature made me feel like I needed to work out more. It was an excellently-balanced hour, with elements of yoga, strength work and a bit of cardio. You can totally see why it’s the preferred gym of Hollywood A-listers: discreet, hip, packed with modern equipment and with a roster of personal trainers guaranteed to put you through your paces.
Get the lifestyle
Spas, treatments, infusions and defying the ageing process: this is the newest mantra in West Hollywood. You could have an amazing facial treatment at Bamford Wellness Spa (1hotels.com/west-hollywood/do/bamford-wellness-spa), where the clinician will pamper you and attempt to stem the tides of time.
Or, you could opt for a more 21st century alternative and try Next Health next-health.com/), which styles itself as a “health optimisation and longevity centre” and offers everything from vitamin injections to personalised testing, cryotherapy and IV Therapy. Anti-ageing treatments have captured the zeitgeist with evangelists like Bryan Johnson extolling the virtues of everything from olive oil to blood plasma swaps.
Whereas in the UK, people pop out for a lunch at Nando’s, here in West Hollywood it might be an IV shot of Niagen IV, a cell replacement therapy that will set you back $2,400 or it might be a quick blast in the cryotherapy chamber to speed up recovery. Whatever you want, Next Health have it.
It’s something that Alfonso has seen grow in popularity in recent years. “I can tell you with certainty that more non-celebrities are using drips, infusion and vitamin therapies,” he says. “In the bubble of the world, everyone wants to look young, both in body and face. There comes point though where we all have to accept that we just get older!”
• If you’re planning a visit to West Hollywood, check www.visitwesthollywood.com
Places to eat
There are some spectacular hotels with excellent restaurants in West Hollywood. Cuisine is varied and delicious, with excellent quality ingredients and impeccable service.
• Ladyhawk at Kimpton La Peer (ladyhawkrestaurant.com)
• Sunset Tower (sunsettowerhotel.com)
• Sunset Marquis Cavatina Restaurant (sunsetmarquis.com)
• Casa Madera at The Mondrian (mondrianhotels.com/los-angeles)
• Merois at Pendry West Hollywood (wolfgangpuck.com/restaurants/merois-west-hollywood)
• Great White (greatwhite.cafe)
• 1 Kitchen at 1 Hotel (1hotels.com/west-hollywood)
• The EDITION (editionhotels.com/weho)
